Ten Reasons to Read “Puck Aholic”

TEN REASONS TO READ “PUCK AHOLIC” BY LILI VALENTE
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Reason #1: Ass-biting mini pigs. (Yup. You read that right. The “hero” isn’t the first to sink his teeth into a sweet piece of ass in this one.)
Reason #2: One dirty-talking hockey player. (Some dirty talk can be cheesy. This is so far from cheesy, guys. This is… lactose intolerant dirty talk. *side eye* *clears throat* I regret nothing.)
Reason #3: The most beautiful, eloquent, and tasteful look into ADHD I’ve ever read.
Reason #4: Killer mermaid lore. (Don’t worry Channing Tatum! I’ll save you! Just back away from the water reeeeal sloooow…)
Reason #5: Lessons on how to establish dominance……. with a pig. (Did anyone else just visualize Christian Grey bending Miss Piggy over a pool table? No? Just me then? Right. *slinks off to hide behind the curtains*)

Reason #6: Magical unicorn penis. (I… *sigh* Not even going there. Just read the book.)

Reason #7: Hammock sex. (But good hammock sex. Hammock sex that will have you forgetting about Ugly Naked Guy and his Play-Doh Fat Factory… Oh, you’d forgotten about that?… I just reminded you?… *shrug* Muh bad.)

Reason #8: The best possible way to get a high score on a pinball machine.
Reason #9: A possible way to overcome automatonophobia. (Go ahead. Google it. I’ll wait…)

and finally…

Reason #10: *Quote* ‘And of course, thinking of bodacious asses makes me think of Tanner and how insanely hot it was to watch his ass muscles clench in the bathroom mirror while he fucked me in the shower last night.’

*Cranks up AC* –beep–beep–beep–
It just got a little sexy up in here, y’all…
Enough yammering from me, get your copy of ‘Puck Aholic’ HERE!
Like, now…
Seriously.
Quit reading this.
Go!
*air kisses*

xoxo
Cat

Ten Reasons to Read “The Last Guy”

TEN REASONS TO READ “THE LAST GUY” BY TIA LOUISE AND ILSA MADDEN-MILLS

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Reason #1: Drag queens (You can’t say no to drag queens. Seriously. You can’t. I’ve tried.)
Reason #2: Office Drama (Don’t tell me you’ve never wanted to rip the blonde highlights out of that brown nosers head in cubicle seven. Because I won’t believe you.)
Reason #3: Boob-grabbing primates. (Nope. Not even talking about dudes gettin’ handsy.)
Reason #4: Beard Burn. (Admit it. It hurts so good.)
Reason #5: Career-minded Women (C’mon. How often do we get that in adult contemporary romance these days? Not as often as I’d like.)
Reason #6: “If God had wanted us to run this early in the morning, he wouldn’t have invented pancakes.” (CAN I GET AN AMEN???)
Reason #7: Enlightened Beauty Pageant Contestants. (Is it a pageant or a “scholarship program”? Let me consult with Sandra Bullock and get back to you.)
Reason #8: The Best O’s you’ll ever read. (Not even joking, guys. This is definitely NSFW, but don’t let that stop you.)
Reason #9: Overprotective Lovers (Because we love them, even when we hate them.)
and finally…
Reason #10: “I would think going to a drag bar would be a hard limit for someone like you.” I take another sip.
“Hard limit?” His dark brow furrows and he glares down at me.
“It’s a fifty… it’s a book reference.”
His eyes drift over me. “Into that BDSM shit, Stone?”
I flush. “No.”
Silence. He’s watching me intently.
“Are you?” I ask.
His face is smooth as glass. Not one iota of an expression is there–his reporter’s mask. “For the right girl, I’d do anything.”

*****

*fans self*
Oh yeah, guys. You want this one. You want it bad.
So get it HERE!
You can thank me later.
XOXO
Cat

Reviewers Needed!

**REVIEWERS NEEDED**
(Kindle readers only please.)

-SHADOWS IN THE DEEP END-
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He was the closest thing to a socialite I’d ever met, and under his thumb my entire world morphed into something I’d never dreamed, never anticipated… and never, ever wanted.
Unfortunately, you can’t step away from a world of prostitution rings and drug dealings without painting a giant target on your back.
And no matter how fast or far you run, no one is out of reach for Luke Montgomery.

If interested, PM me your Kindle address and add authorcatherineblack (at) gmail (dot) com to your list of approved senders to obtain your #free copy.
(Note: Please read and consider the trigger warnings provided at the beginning of this novel.)

Find the book HERE!

Allergies Suck.

I haven’t been able to breathe through my nose for two weeks. That may not sound too bad, but I assure you it is.

I’m ready to be able to sleep without waking up to dry mouth. Ready to eat easily. Ready to workout again. Ready to talk without gasping for breath.

Basically, I’m ready for some rain to wash away this damn ragweed.

In the mean time, I’m all ears if you have some kind of secret to dealing with allergies. Because my daily pill and nasal spray isn’t cutting it.

Paranormal is my Normal

There are plenty of authors out there that can walk into Starbucks, order their skinny latte, grab a seat, and break out their books to do a little research for their next novel.

Good for them, but…

I am NOT one of those authors.

Wanna get some scared/dirty/disgusted/freaked out looks?

Open these babies in a crowded coffee shop and see how fast people flee…

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